In our earlier blog post we looked at the most common hurdles people encounter when trying to have an orgasm. Today, we are diving a little deeper on this topic by trying to understand what an orgasm really is.

 Like we said before, everyone is unique. No matter how much information you read or study, each person finds out what makes them excited and brings real pleasure through their own experiments and self-awareness.

But what an orgasm really is?

It has been studied, written about, and spoken about in countless discussions. They talk about it, whisper about it and fantasize over it. Several expert sources will give you various definitions but one of the simplest and most available comes from Wikipedia: “Orgasm (from the Greek ὀργασμός, orgasmos; ‘excitement, swelling’) or sexual climax is the sudden release of accumulated sexual excitement during the sexual response cycle, resulting in rhythmic, involuntary muscle contractions in the pelvic region characterized by sexual pleasure.”

And who among those seeking orgasm has ever realized that an orgasm is its peak point; its culmination; its finishing line? And as it turns out, it’s not always the main goal. For majority of couples however, the primary goal remains enjoying sex itself.

Simply put, there are two stages to sexual pleasure: “Enjoying Arousal” stage 1 phase, and “Enjoying Orgasm” stage 2 part . Each stage may also have their own problems and specifics respectively.

Phase 1 “Enjoying Arousal” includes desire for sex and ability to get stimulated. A high proportion of both women and men rely heavily on their attraction to build up their sex drive as well as improve this attribute. When desire or sex drive fails in women they may refer to it as “sexual dysfunction” while men refer that in terms of erectile dysfunction.

What follows after getting sexually aroused is Phase 2 “Enjoying Orgasm” i.e., attaining orgasm. The problems related to this part are known as “orgasmic dysfunction” and “anorgasmia” respectively.

Anorgasmia may be either absolute (never having reached orgasm from any kind of stimulation) or coital (achieving orgasm through masturbation but not with a partner). In men, there may still be ejaculation without orgasmic sensations, often associated with psychological issues, anorgasmia. Organic problems that can lead to a total lack or delayed ejaculation. The presence of the pathology can only be established by a physician who will conduct the necessary tests.

A bit more science on the topic. According to the international classification of anorgasmia: “Anorgasmia is characterized by the absence or marked irregularity of orgasm or noticeably reduced intensity of orgasmic sensations despite adequate sexual stimulation, including desire for sexual activity and orgasm. This pattern exists consistently or periodically for at least several months.”

What does it mean?

If a woman or man is able to achieve an orgasm in any way, then it is not a pathology. It’s normal when one manages to get orgasms from masturbation but not during penetration.

It’s also normal when orgasms occur during intercourse due to additional clitoral stimulation. It's better to understand yourself first before you diagnose yourself with something imaginary and step away from being sexually active. At that point seeking multiple opinions might help, so it's better to consult a specialist on this matter. Try boosting your libido.

Key Takeaways:

If you cannot have orgasms solely through penetrative sex - IT IS NOT A PATHOLOGY; YOU ARE PERFECTLY NORMAL.

This will be your chance to extend your understanding of some parts of the body, erogenous zones and sexual fantasies so you can have a great sex life with orgasms. You may use aoi massage and personal sex toys to start with as these are the best tools for self-discovery, R3 - rabbit vibrator together with a lubricating gel.

You may find that there is a savage uncontrolled tiger deep inside you just waiting to be unleashed.